Roll up, roll up! Ladies, gentlemen, ducks, one and all. Everybody is invited to play Plaice Your Bets, the newest, most technologically advanced thing-a-ma-game in the whole of Sharl... Croal? What was the name of this godforsaken place again?

Anyway *cough*, how rude of me not to introduce myself. My name is Archibald Swindle and this is my faithful assistant Finworth. We'll be standing by to help you play (and relieve you of your precious currency...)

The jackpot is currently standing at over 5,000 Meteorites, think what you could you do with that money? You sir could finally fix that creaking knee. You madam, a cruise around the asteroid belt. Just think of the possibilities!

So what are you waiting for, step right up and Plaice Your Bet!

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